Jodoh Lesson Shopping Session

i'm gonna talk about jodoh a bit lah ok today.

if i can talk about jodoh in term of shopping, there are three different situations:

1. when you see a dress on sale, you may like the colour, the pattern, the cutting. but something's not right. when you try it on, it doesn't fit you. or when you imagine yourself wearing it, it doesn't suit you. you like it, but it's not for you. it's just not you. the same thing goes to jodoh.

you like someone, but you know you're not compatible on some level. you don't have chemistry. you just like the idea of them, but you don't love them. or you know somebody with whom you have the C&C, somebody you would fall for if he was a fictional character, you would fall even more for if he existed in the real world. but now you've met him, you like him as a person, but you don't love him in that way. 

the way i didn't buy a dress i would have bought, but for some reasons, i didn't.

2. you are searching for the perfect shoes. one shop after another, the whole mall you've conquered. but nothing is right for you. you like the colour, but you don't wear high heels. you like the design, but you don't wear flats. time is running out, so you just have to buy a pair, against your will, just to have something to wear. 

like the first situation, the second situation is based on personal experience. hehe. both are somewhat common but the second one left more impression. i had explored one mall in penang and gone into each store thrice, but i just couldn't make up my mind, because i didn't find exactly what i had in mind. i had shortlisted some pairs. i even planned to buy two pairs if i just couldn't choose. it turned out, one day of shoe seeking was fruitless. i bought none. i left feeling cranky i even said no to the best steak i haven't had in years. omg what a waste. 

the next day i went to another mall, this time my mom accompanied me, because she wanted me to just buy a pair and get it over with. under her pressure, i bought one. at the last row of shoes, i found it. i did a double take. i decided to buy it. but i was not happy. i felt... forced. like a forced marriage lol. to me if i'm gonna buy something, i'm gonna spend money only on what i feel worth it, what i love. the same goes to marriage.

a few minutes later, i accepted the fact that i have paid for the shoes, so i might as well accepted them.

i said something like this, "macam ni lah kot jodoh. taknak pun beli jugak."

ma replied "memula memangla tak suka. lepastu belajarla hidup dengan kekurangan dia. terima jelah seadanya."

we both laughed.

and... it's true. after i brought it home, i couldn't take my eyes off it. i couldn't wait to wear it. suddenly it was... sufficient to me? sufficient for me? hahaha so weird romanticizing shoes like this. now i love it. sometimes when i wear it, i eye my shoes... it doesn't have all the criteria of the perfect shoes i was looking for; not the design, not the colour, nothing. but now i feel that my shoes are enough. it fits me perfectly and perfectly matches my clothes :)

3. one day, i helped my friend look for a new card holder for her id card. there were card holders of all colours and cartoon characters... i found one of hello kitty. i knew she loves hello kitty so much she is even a collector, so i showed it to her. she was thrilled. then i found something which thrilled me too. a pink card holder with a pink lanyard. it was so cute! sort of love at first sight, but then it already fit my criteria. i wanted it so bad! but i was contemplating whether to buy it or not. my card holder, although detached from the UK/US lanyard for A-Level students, although dangled only on a keychain with a yellow koala face and my house key, was still in no state which needed me to buy a new one for my id. i didn't have a reason to buy it, so i didn't.

one month and a half later, a few days ago, my plastic card holder got torn apart. so i went to the same shop. there it was, the pink card holder with the pink lanyard. it was not hanged like other card holders, it dropped on some place else, somewhere i didn't have to look for. i found it straightaway without even looking. guess what, it was the last one left! had i gone a little later, somebody else could have bought it! i would have to settle with boring black lanyards or plain plastic card holders... but no, i went to the shop at the right time.

i told this to my friend. so it started from there.

"kita datang dulu tapi tak beli. kita memang nak sangat. rupanya belum sampai masa... sekarang masanya dah tiba!"

"ya Allah ama..." her mouth was left hanging, the realization in her eyes of where this was going.

"timing awak... timing. the right time..."

"macam jodoh."

"jodoh datang ikut timing. dulu kita takde sebab nak beli, sekarang ada sebab..."

"jodoh datang.......... bila perlu."

*DUA DUA TERNGANGA TERBELIAK TERPANA DENGAN KEBIJAKSANAAN SENDIRI*

prior to the mindblowing finding we were already talking about this topic, she told me about the only book she's read from cover to cover because it was so good. the book is about jodoh. then i left to go to the shop. when i returned, we kinda continued our conversation, that's why even this event was linked to jodoh... it's not like we see the concept of fate in everything, hahaha no, hahaha who does that, hahaha lame-o~~~ hahaha... 

ok.

so yeah.

just imagine if we can actually shop for jodoh. omg. can i do it online? can i have free shipping? can i custom made it? can i illegally download it? can i have the promotion package? can i buy 1 free 1?

i'd say finding a mate is pretty much like shopping. yet, you decide your own fate. you determine whether you want the product despite the price. if you don't get off your arse, no dress, no shoes, no card holder is gonna fall onto your lap from the sky. just because God has written it all down for you, doesn't mean you just have to wait and He'll throw it to your face. nothing is gonna shove itself up your nose.

just like shopping, it might take a day or two, swollen feet, messed up mind, questionable choices, regrettable resits, before you find the perfect match. but when you do, even if it's not perfect, you will find that it perfectly fits you.