my love is based on friendship

baru habis membaca Where Rainbows End by cecelia ahern.

gil dorg ni. memang soulmate betul. who can guess they will eventually be together when they are 50 eh? peluang nak ade zuriat pon dah takde. kesiannnnn.

they tell each other EVERYTHING. AND they have been friends since they were seven yet they never lost contact even for a week. now that shows what the real friendship is withouth hiding any secret intention. and they are faithful btw, sebab lepas rosie terkissed alex tapi tak dibalas,
dorg still kawan.

dorg takdelaa "oh die tak ske aku buatpe nak kawan"
dorg buang segala awkwardness sbb dorg syg friendship dorg.
not like him, bastard. muahaha.

even before bace where Where Rainbows End, kann, memang aku dah aim dah. nak bercinta ngn bestfriend je. heheh gatal. serious. because bestfriend is the one who knows u the best kan.
u dont hide ur flaws from bestfriend, sometimes u even reveal them, but u do hide ur flaws from the person u aim to be with. and that's not healthy. and when u go out u tend to impress the person because u know u have to be suberbly impressive to let the romance takes place. tak ori langsung.

tapi bila ngn bestfriend, we try to annoy them so much. we burp. we fart. we show our stupid self. senang cakap bestfriend tau lah perangai kite camne. ni kalau bercinta ngn bukan bestfriend, org biase, kite mesti segan sentiasa kann? pastu try nak jadi mcm yg die nak, hipokrit betol.

aku even buat satu quiz en, and indeed my love is based on friendship.

jap korg bestfriend yg berjantina lelaki jgn tiba2 menjauhkan diri dari aku lak.

bukannya aku nak kat kau pon. haha. aku takde perasan kat laki sekarang. walaupon afiq gila cakap aku lesbian, tapi aku tak ok. so hazirah kite meraba awk tu atas dasar maen2 je. muahaha. jangan risau laki dan pompuan. friend friend :D

and mmg banyak plak saying mcm ckp;
friendship is more worth than romance.
mmg betul kalau fikir balik kn. bestfriend is forever, lover is er.. not forever?
ah u got the idea.

but in order to have such u have to gamble everything especially ur friendship. and if it turns out bad, jangan haraplah korg boleh jadi mcm dulu.

so here i say, dont try. just let it be. i know some people who is in this case (ehhem ehhem)
and dont risk what could be a lifetime treasure; let it be. it will lead there somehow if u were meant to be together. ceh. kalau korg pegang saying ni, memang gejala couple yg tempah hotel, buang anak takkan terjadi lah.

tapi papepon pesanan penaja yg paling penting;
SILA BERCINTA LEPAS BELAJAR. AND KALAU ADE PERASAAN PON JGN LAYAN. KAWEN .. EH, KAWAN JE. BERCINTA PON LEBIH BAIK SELEPAS KAHWIN. terima kasih.

camne nak kawen kalau tak kenal betul2? tu la gunanya couple mereka kata.
tula gunanya berkawan aku kata.
berkawan tanpa agenda tersembunyi, kau pon tau sikap buruk die semua. orang sekarang ni banyakk bercinta bgi nak rak belum pape dah merasa mcm2 (otak sape cpt pick up bertuah anda) bila kawen dua bulan terus cerai. memang umat akhir zaman betul.

aku outdated kau kate? ade aku kesah? takdeee.

Your Love is Based on Friendship

For you, chemistry doesn't really happen without compatibility. Companionship and openness are the most important parts of your relationships. Whoever you love should be your best friend. And falling in love with a good friend is never out of the question. Why your love can last: You only fall for people who you truly understand... and who truly understand you Why your love can fail: Sometimes you don't admit how important physical chemistry is to you

I Love Novels of Disaster

after twilight i have 6 novels to finish, and now i have just finished PS I Love You by cecelia ahern. so now i got 5 left ;

notice the pattern of my reading? never 'how to be popular' sort of thing. always the novel full of troubles and misery and problems and life disaster; get my head out of my own life i supposed. but how bad lives in the book could be, i always find something that would make me jealous with the characters' being. still for me reading is a therapy and would be much better if not including all the happiness of the world.

PS I Love You is a what should i say? easy read novel.

no its not about hi school sweethearts leaving notes at the end of every class on the table which end with ps i love you, not that kind of easy read. its a novel full of emotion, which is bittersweet and makes me feel very sorry for the character but at the same time jealous of her life. she's been through a dreadful tragedy and yet she's got her family and friends sticking with her and she's got a life full of surprise and not as bad as she thinks it is.

i almost want to be holly. to feel the longing, the happiness of finding such man and the sadness to watch him die and the support she has and actually many other wonderful things in life waiting for her only she, doesnt know that which leads her to be so gloomy.

it is heavy jugak i might say, for one who doesnt enjoy reading such a sad story about a widow. but its easy and i feel at ease reading it. never so jump-at-the-new-surprising-sentence. its a novel u can read on a vacation, at a beach maybe. and never have to go through the tense.

a novel to ease your soul.

my favorite quote and the one somehow made my eyes watered is ;

"nobody's life is filled with perfect little moments. and if they were, they wouldnt be perfect little moments. they would just be normal. how would you ever know happiness if you'd never experienced downs?"

the last line that hits me most.

oh you wouldnt know how deep it touches me. i cried. again. not a surprise.

sometimes i just wonder how can one has everything so perfectly easy. even though maybe i have something she wishes she has still i often thing she's the lucky one. because what i have is not many to be proud of. not many compared to what they have that burns me. that is more to be catched, more to be embraced, and i cant see my future if this path keeps creeping on the very norm of life, on something expected. i need more miracles to help me fly.

even smallest thing they have i do adore, i long for that something that they are never aware of. they just go through it, pass it as usual and not caring to feel blessed and to be extra happy for what they have. why should they be aware and let alone happy for such an easy thing to get in life? they will be happy if they can buy the ridiculously expensive cloth and ah never mind the tiny little things they have which i want to have as well.

they always have it right away, shoved to their nose whenever they need them. so they never feel the pain, the bad feeling of not having things particularly the things that appear to them; everyday's dust. cant blame them though for being showered with the beam of heaven.

but i think those people can never feel happiness the way one with pain does.

they got it, use it, pass it, leave it. but for the people who feel the pain in lives,

the things 'easy' people see as dust can appear like sand of diamonds washed ashore.

i think the most painful life to get through is having not enough love and even when others claim the love is always there; somehow u cant feel it. and also the uncertainty of where your future might lead u and even when u have the key, the door always seems to be locked even more.

ah damn us humans too selfish thinking of our own selves and mopping for our own life's sake and thinking our life sucks when other people might have it worse. but thankfully i know my life is better then theirs, and should be grateful for that, but not as better as others', and ah after all what can moping and hoping do to hurt us even more?

for now i just accept life as it is, and be thankful for what i have,

and really hope that the quote will beam on me someday,

and i'll be the happiest person in the world considering everything.

Aku kekasih Fahrin Ahmad

DREAM 1

this dream was weird because i already knew my mark for bm, but then ...

............................................................................................................................................................................

cgu mona said our marks were rather disappointing, and only two got As.

izzudin got A and tah i forgot the other one. and that meant i didnt get A.

andd...

I got 76!!! which in the dream was a b. no more hope to be on the top ;(

oh my god.

............................................................................................................................................................................

in real life i got A but not 76, and it made me worry because maybe,

the mark i got was the wrong one. and maybe, my number was rolling down the list. or else why in the world would i have such dream? okay mimpi mainan tidur. but as tomorrow is the day kitorg dapat final result, nombor, ranking, hah it maybe means something.

____________________________________________________________________

DREAM 2

and this dream, is the best lah betul aku cakap.

guess what. fahrin ahmad was in it. yes, the fahrin ahmad.

he was a friend of family, and that day was my brother's wedding (tah bila pulak aku ade abang kelima nih)

and after penat2 handle kenduri i fell asleep. so i'm gonna write started from that moment lah.

and paling best, the night before the kenduri kan orang byk datang rumah, fahrin was there too.

so we sort of did something that meant we were together. ah jgn fikir jauh. gatal.

it was just something stupid but at that time we started holding hands :D

hahaha. serious ni FAKTA mimpi ok BUKAN AUTA semata. terimalah kenyataan aku bercinta ngn fahrin dalam mimpi tu. kalau rase nak termuntah sila jgn baca.

......................................................................................................................................................................

"ergh. penatnya" i sighed sambil melihat fahrin berdiri di muka pintu bilikku (kenduri, semua org share bilik)

"dah lama u tidur tau. bangunla dah senja ni" dengan hensem beliau berkata2.

"haa? pukul 7?! u tau tak mana mama i?"

"oh family u dah pergi rumah belah perempuan. dorg taknak kejut u tadi"

"so sape lagi kat umah ni?" hmm. peluang. muahahaha

"u, i ngn ade sedara mara tumpang mandi solat semua"

"ohhh" dammit.

"hey i heard about your dinner tu. boleh i antarkan nanti"

"ya allah!!! dinner krk!!! lupa betul!!!" aku gelabah bangun. "ya allah camne ni?? camne i boleh lupa! u die start pukul 8 ok! i ade sejam lagi ni!"

"la ye ke?? so siap lah cepat!!!"

so i grabbed my towel and my night gown semua. takde mase nak berkemban depan sedara mara walaupon fahrin ade. lah. banyak gilaaa sedara aku nak gne toilet. sampai berattur ni! beragaklaa sikit, janganla buat rumah aku mcm dewan kebajikan. kenduri dah habes! balik!!!

still aku pon ikot beratur. oh my lamanya. aku pergi toilet master bedroom mama. ahh tidak, lagi ramai sedara yg aku tak kenal pon. adehh.

"er boleh guna toilet tak? ade hal nak cepat ni"

"tak boleh. kena beraturla. kitorg pon lama tunggu ni" sorg sedara berupa bangla jawab. tah bila plak aku ade pertalian darah ngn bangla ni. so aku tunggu. takleh buat ape ah. selepas rasenya 27 minit tunggu, aku pon dapat masuk.

tensyen gilaaaa. patutnya akulaa yg kena guna toilet lama. ngn berpeluh melekit melayan tetamu ke sini ke sana kasi bunga telur semua, aku la yg kena mandi puas2 utk jadi wangi malam ni. ni tak. demi menjimatkan masa, aku pon mandi dalam lima minit je.

"jangan pandang!! i nak cari baju! ya allah i taktau pon nak pakai baju ape!!!!"

"theme die ape?" fahrin hensem tanya sambil tak pandang aku. do not misunderstand. i was still in the night gown ok. die cuma mengikut arahan je.

"err. traditional or formal i think. obv i nak pakai traditional la. tapi takde baju yg that traditional. takkanla nak pakai baju kurung biase kan?" bebelan.

"buatlah jadi that traditional" sukahati kau je.

"ohh i tau! i ade sari, so sari pon traditional kan? i nak pakai sari tu! lain dari yg lain. u rase?"

"anything will do" ceh. camnila aku nak. hekhek.

yes baby?

so i changed to my sari. baju dalam die hijau2 sikit, tapi sari yg balut badan aku tu kaler purple. weird combination. but tah camne, i looked stunning. hakhak.

"there!" aku tarik nafas lega.

"siap? ok jom. kite ade 5 minutes before 8 ni"

"nak pg mane?" tiba2 ade harith iskandar lak. hesh kacau je. die mcm sidekick fahrinla dlm mimpi ni.

"nak hantar pg dinner die. sape lagi ade kat bawah?"

"oh semua sedare die dah balik. tinggal kite tiga je. aku nak ikot"

"kau jage rumah lah please?" bestnya ckp ngn artis camtu.

"ala dinner kau bukan jauh kan, aku boring lah" kate beliau sambil menjilat sudu ais krim.

"ah yelahh. jom!"

fahrin ngn harith mendahului. sekejap je dorg dah masuk kereta. aku pandang kat cermin besar kat living room tu, one last check. oh. my. god. i looked horrible.

my face was pale. my lips was also pale. i had eye bags. and worse, my hair was uncombed, it had intersecting lines for god's sake, and i looked really hideous. ah well, at least i got fahrin as a boyfriend. but i really had to do something about this.

"heyyy! heyyyy!!!!" i called the guys in the car. harith went out.

"harith, kau cakap kat fahrin, aku nak buat final touch. jap je tau!!!!!!!

so i ran upstairs and began my agenda.

. . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .. . . . .. . . . .

"amaa? u tau tak dekat sejam i duduk dlm kereta tunggu u. u buat pe?"

"ah. i had final touch."

"like what?"

"mandi. takpe rambut i dah kering. manicure. scrub. and sekarang simple make up"

i said as i applied the mascara. dark eyeshadow, rose blusher, deep earth colour lipstick.

there. natural-look make up. nothing too obvious and girly and vogue.

"u tau tak sekarang pukul berapa?"

"taulaa. u jgn buat i tensyen. ok sekarang dah 9.30, but i'm still going. takkanla i nak pg awal ngn muka mcm tadi. baik lambat sikit asal i nampak elok kan?"

"masalahnya dah lambat sangat ni"

"i knowww. i kena pergi tau tak. kang marah plak budak2 tu bila tak cukup org pergi. and, i dah bayar, nanti burn masuk perut orang lain" aku jawab sambil pakai anting2 yg memang matchlah ngn sari ni. what an indian look. satu lgi FAKTA ; kawan2 aku kat mrsm dulu ingat aku ade mix ngn hindustan something sebab mata aku ade line hitam. tergelak2 aku sampai dorg rase terhina.

"tengok. i dah siap. perfectly. takdela maen taruk mcm tadi. tapi sekarang dah malamla, nnt kalau family i balik camne? harith taknak jaga rumah. and asal dorg tak balik2 lagi ah?"

"takpe nanti kitorg balikla jaga rumah ok after hantar u"

"alaa. i thought u were going with me?"

"what? of couse not. but i will be happy to" he smiled. ahh

"we arent allowed to bring guests i think, but kesah ape, they will be happy to meet you"

"boleh ke? ok then" ahh. going to the dinner with fahrin, what a surprise to my friends.

"eh jap. i ingat! tonight my bro from new zealand nak baliklaaa! patutla family i tak balik lagi. mama ade cakap dorg nak trus amek angah!"

"la ye ke?"

"asal laa semua harini. wedding, dinner, arrival. takde hari laen ke?"

i said. ouch. wait. i stiffened. oh. my.

"fahrin, em. harini hari ape?"

"er, selasa?"

"ya allah. ya allah. ya allah. ahhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!"

"kenapa kenapa?" fahrin gelabah utk aku. how sweet. haha

"fahrin. adoi. i silap. tadi i bangun u terus cakap pasal dinner. and i tgh mamai. sebenarnyaaa"

"ape???"

"sebenarnya dinner tu esok!!!!" i felt like crying. trus aku terduduk. sia sia semua.

"ha? betul ke?" die pon terkejut.

"betul. aduhh. penat i dress semua camni. make up la manicure laa. last2 esok!!! ahhh"

we sat in silence.

then fahrin broke the silence.

"hm. takpelah. tak sia sia pon. jom i bawak u makan."

"kat mane? i pelik la pakai mcm indian tetiba"

"takpelah, so kite pergi restoran india. jom?" he smiled and tugged my hand. ah how dream boleh menghalalkan perbuatan. hahaa

"hahh. yelah. jom. make sure berbaloi ngn ape i pakai ni"

"okay."

so we walked hands in hands towards the car :D

____________________________________________________________________

too good to be true?

menyampah?

impossible?

aku make up?

aku manicure?

aku speaking?

aku ngn fahrin?

aku pakai sari?

aku ngn fahrin?

pelik?

terimalah kenyataan.

pelik pelik pon, aku tak menipu.

nama pon mimpi :D

tekak yg sakit mengeluarkan kata2

tekak aku sakit lagi. tonsel ok.
ape kau ingat ringan sangat ke sakit aku ni. ringan2 bak datanglaa transfer tekak.
aku asal tonsel je mesti kne flu. tonsel dah habes, batuk plak datang.
macamtulaa cyclenya.

punca?? nah.
minum air sejuk/air panas/bersin salah style/kepala terbalik sampai body fluid masuk idung.

besides reason aku sesungut teruk and tahap malas yg melampau,
tonsel jugaklah punca utama aku selalu tak datang sekolah.

doctor suruh operate. dah sebabnya sejak aku sekolah rendah muka aku jela yg selalu kat klinik tu. dua bulan sekali mesti kena. doctor pon siap dah menunggu kedatangan aku tau.
kiranya antibiotik tu mcm dah jadi makanan ruji plak.

yang takutnya, antibiotik kan kalau banyak2 kan tak elok, boleh kena sakit buah pinggang ke ape tah. and menurut doctor gregory house dlm cerita house, antibiotik juga menyebabkan gigi menjadi kuning. padanla gigi aku agak tak bersinar sekarang ni. terkilan betul.

tapi aku tamau operate. tolonglah. kang tiba2 terpotong plak voicebox aku segala,
dah bisu sape nak jawab??? takpasal2 tertinggal la plak kapas kat tekak aku ni. oh mintak jauhlaa. and tekak kan sebenarnya antibody semulajadi badan something, so maybe ade kemungkinan yg bila dah buang, badan jadi makin tak tahan bakteria lah. kang macam2 penyakit lak singgah kang. tu tak kira lagi ade mitos kate kalau buang tonsel berat badan naekk wooo.

kang kalau tak operate plak, camne aku nak hidup? dah air pon boleh mendatangkan masalah kesihatan, memang susahlah. camnelaa aku nak survive kalau tiba2 aku kne pergi oversea, takyah pk jauhlah ok camne kalau tiba2 aku kne masuk hostel balik?
wehh pedih wehh aku dah rase dah pengalaman menderita tonsel kat mrsm.

aku dtg minum air kat rumah org laen pon, tiba2 boleh shivered badan tau. kira aku ni boleh jadi mesin mendetect bnda2 kotor kat dalam air la. amacam nak offer air rumah kau?





aku ternanti2 satu hari bila aku tayah risau pasal periksa.

tapi ade ke hari camtu? tak mungkinlah terutama untuk org cam aku yg ade sedara sebaya yg maknya asek nak mengompare kan aku ngn anak die tak habes habess. sikit2 call tye perkembangan. tak pelah die nak ckp ape ma biar je, aku ckp kat mama. tp dlm hati, go get a life lah.

aku rase kan, sampai mati pon aku kne bersaing ngn die.
sekarang compare nombor, result, koko,
lagi setahun compare pmr, offer asrama,
lagi tiga tahun compare spm, offer u,
lagi sepuluh tahun compare kerja apa, achievement setakat mana degree ke master,
lagi dua belas tahun compare sape kawen dulu, berapa banyak rombongan meminang,
lagi lima belas tahun compare sape suami, kerja, income, rumah besar mana
lagi dua puluh tahun compare berapa anak
lagi tiga puluh tahun compare anak sape lagi pandai, dah pergi haji belum,
lagi empat puluh tahun compare sape menopause dulu, sape cucu lagi ramai
lagi lima puluh tahun compare kubur sape paling cantik plak.

aku tak kesah.

my achievements are only for my record, and not done to impress any of u people let alone winning this unhealthy competition. thank you.

bukan hari2 kita last day form 2 kan?

so mari bergambar!!! :D
sayangnya kitorg tak dapat bergambar kat kelas kitorg, memandangkan kehadiran
kitorg di tingkat atas dewan peperiksaan SPM adalah prohibited.
so kitorg hanya menumpang kelas2 di bawah,
yang sangat langit dan bumi daripada kelas kitorg.
so, jangan ckp kelas kitorg buruk, itu kelas diorang.

sekali lagi ; INI BUKAN KELAS KAMI!

i'm going to miss that pipi. and you're going to miss this pervert.

kaum yg sayangkan game daripada classmate sendiri

bersama cikgu mona kesayangan. tahun depan cgu ajar ye??

4 jejaka terhangit untuk tatapan korg

LISTEN weh,
i love you Cemerlang (1) the third batch of RK!!!
i know i dont have your love,
but seriously i dont care.
although u keep making me a subject to gossip (ceh. haha)
a subject to laugh at
a subject whose personal life can never be that private,
a subject who tends to make u angry
a subject sometimes hurt by your words
but love is stronger than hatred kan?
this will keep going, there will be times when u hate me and i hate u and we hurt each other and we fight and cry
but in the end, it's all about love.
A tear or two wont hurt on days like this kan?
so that was what we did.
cried. i likeeee.
 

ALLAH Ar-Rahman, a thanks.

I’m reasonably feeling guilty for what allah is showering me now. I’m not that good. I’m not that perfect. Still he pleasures me with almost everything I pray for. I got the As for some subjects I suck at and aku tak layak langsung nak terima semua ni. I was like crying knowing I get the As. Sumpah sebak. And that’s only the little things allah gave me, and there are like trillion with the ten zeros other things he has been given me, and I didn’t care to thank him.

I only realized I got the As, and not the air he provides so I’m not choked to death. Maybe it’s the same with all of us kan? Bnda yg dah ade depan mata kite tak perasan. Pastu bnda mcm result exam la yg kite tau nak bersyukur. So us. So human. So, ignorant.

I don’t think I deserve all this. Not that I foolishly refused the advantages and benefits I have been given, for the sake that I’m not qualified. Of course not, ya allah of course not. I’m just wondering how indescribably generous HE is, towards a person with flaws like me. I’m not that kind. Still he helps me in my exams, in life. Ohh how small we are. How, helpless we actually are.

I made mistakes over and over again but he helps me. That’s what has been bothering me. I’m afraid he is just making everything so easy, and then the opposite for PMR. I’m afraid he isn’t planning to show me how to deal with real life now; indeed he will do it next year.

But I’m just curious kan? How can he be so generous towards a person like me? Maybe that’s just because he is the Ar-Rahman. No need to question his blessings, don’t. I want to thank you ya allah for u always help me through thick and thin. Maybe this is how u balanced it kan?

Because I notice u haven’t make it THAT easy for me with everything else, something else. Kan? I’m so thankful for EVERYTHING u have blessed me with.

And please, one more, the most important thing of all;

Please, please, please prevent the thing I fear most from happening,

To stay as far away, to wait a long time ahead, to not come, when I’m not capable of facing it. I will never be, as long as I’m who I am now. Please ya allah.

And thank you, for everything.

Ps ; I will come up with posts about the times I had in sklk, starting with the moment waiting for UPSR result. Actually the UPSR thing I was about to write it today, as today is the day when the kids got their result, but my heart told my hands to write this instead.

Got to go HEROES is waiting!

2 Cemerlang (1) feast ;)

it wasn't as expected.
pretty disappointing, maybe. but i did hope that we would walk in group ramai2 tau semua, ngan ketiadaan budak laki dlm gambar, sungguh tak professional. budin je yg mcm ok nak dirakamkanmukanya, tapi yg laen plak taknak. sian kau.

ok tape, sbb ade wakil da kate sori so takpela kan.

at first when we wanted to buy tickets for movie, bad luck soaring up.
there's nothing except madagascar and hi schl musical.
tah salah ape tah, we bought hi schl musical.
ok. first :
1. i never watched, except the first time which i with instant dislike switched channel
2. we wanted to watch tropic thunder tapi memandangkan muka kitorg comel2 tak dapatlaa meyakinkan abang counter yg kitorg ni 18 and above. satu disadvantage tu.
3. abang tu buat muke poyo so we hastily bought hi schl musical.
4. man, that would be my first time watching the film, and lagi bestnya, watching a movie i did not want to.

kitorg ke kinokuniya. aku beli dua buku. before final dah beli lima, sekarang baru start bace twilight. ni tambah lagi dua. tujuh novel untuk dibaca. memang takde keja laenlaa nanti.

- p/s I Love You (ini femes, tak payah review lah kan?)
- A Gathering Light (a teenager lives in 1900 fought her destiny and finding her own way, agak mistery sebab ade bunuh2. award winning, sure best gila)

then when we were about to buy some stuffs to feed my discontented heart watching the movie, we realized something. poster besar, pink, empat laki satu pompuan. mata sepet. cerita jepun!!!! i've NEVER EVER WATCHED a japanese ke korean movie ke before ni, but somehow when i saw the poster, with the 'the most sensational box office' , i leaped. yes. dengan kawan2 yang minat cerita jepun, there'd be no more HSM.

so my brilliant brain reminded us that gang hafizah, suka gila HSM. so dengan gelojohnya kitorg call dorg, paksa dorg beli tiket HSM dari kitorg, and kitorg pergi beli tiket Boys Over Flowers.

and that, was the very first time i watched japanese movie. break the record.

and i saw AMIR IZUDDIN. long time no see. rindulaa zaman kite dlu2. ceh. time kecik2 skola rendahlaa bestfriend2 semua. sumpah tinggi kau ek. die nampak aku kot, sebab die pandang. cume taktau ah die kenal tak. and AFIQ IKHWAN. satu soalan : kau tak terpengaruh ngan sisi gelap sekolah sains alam shah kan? petang tu aku msg die, die ckp die xnmpk aku. hampeh. kecik sangatkah aku ni sampai die boleh tak nmpk? haha

okeh. and some difficulties on the way home i BETTER NOT MENTION.

so here are the pictures :::

Two C (1)

yeay yeay daa habes wehhh!
habess! habesssss exammm
wwahhh sukenyaaaaa aku :D

mase aku habes last paper td, dlm hati terdetik

"ni maybe kali terakhir aku amek final ngn budak2 ni. next year pmr, the next year lg ramai lak yg nak bermigrasi. aku nak hayati saat ni"

budak2 laki mcm biase, tp dgn extra effort untuk jadi bising, mereka pon berlari2 kejar2ran dlm kelas. tergelak2 sakan. budak pompuan, mcm budak pompuanlah. mesti dorg sme nak release tensyen kan. so thats whylaa berperangai mcm beruk sikit. hahaaaa

rase seronok lak aku. seronok tgk dorg sme camni. dua c satu *background music~

aku masuk krk first time dulu, aku tak ske. sbb aku takde kwn. budak2 from sklk dah ade click masing2 and the rest ialah budak melawati n dua org budak dr permata ngn bukit indah tersesat. mule2 mmg takleh nak ngam ngn mane2 pon.

so aku pon blah ke mrsm serting. tbe2 aku masuk balik krk, adus malu takyah ckp ah. budak kuar asrama. tapi krk yg terbaik, so aku buat muke tembok je la.

dulu boys ngn girls memang SUMPAH MCM ANJING NGN KUCING. nak bercakap secara normal pon takleh, ni kan plak nak flirt (not that i have/had any intention for that). asek gaduh je. memang tak leh ngam. masing2 bleh tak tegur langsung utk sehari. tegur pon utk mencari pasal. pastu tengking menengking memanjang. gila ah.

dan sekarang, naseblaa walau tak serapat mane, blehlaa gak nak campur ngn dorg. tapi sebab majo mereka ni berfikiran sempit, so bila laki pompuan rapat or cakap sikit, ade potential utk jd cte hot. so tu salah satu sebab mcm ade wall la separates us.

i admit i want to see all of us to be a family. tapi takpelah at least now better than dulu. pastu aku sure most of the boys ade ego dorg yg konon cam unik lah. dorg bila ade gang, ramai2, tak ckp lgsg ngn pompuan. buat tak kenal. tapi bila dorg sorg2, atau dua tiga org je, cerita mcm2 semua boleh. sampai kitorg si perempuan malas nak layan. haha. which class lagi yg ade perangai mcm kitorg ni??

and pnah budak pompuan kelas kitorg, dulu2, sbb tak tahan sgt ngn perangai laki dorg gi hantar surat layang memaki hamun budak laki. credit to the gossip girls la, alaa gang yg kecoh2 tu. dua tiga org je dapat sampai semua nak backup marah2 pompuan. tapi last2, bawa kebaikan gak ah surat tu sbb semua da ok dan tak bersifat sexist. kan kan?? and sekarang walaupon budak pompuan ade gap tapi kitorg memang boleh campur. rase best sgt. tak taulaa asal excited semcm ni. datang bulan kot. kahkah. gelak laa weeei.

kelas kitorg ni mcm2la, kne pggl kaunseling laa. bukanlaa sbb perangai teruk ke ape, tapi sebab *rahsia*. pastu penah jadi record breaker (psl kejadian kat sanggar bahasa, xkan xingat?) and mcm2 lah. walaupon si laki2 semua ade sedikit blue (alaa sape tak?), kire dorg maybe the best dalam kalangan student form two. kire agak ok laa kan perlakuan semua.

kitorg laki pompuan mane ade pegang2 bertepuk bertampar, manade secare depan2 saling bercakap lucah walaupon atas dasar gurauan, and tahlaa aku just rase yg we're the best lah. haha. even tcer pat pon ckp kelas kitorg yg terbaik, despite perangai budak2 laki yg bising, melawan, dan memeningkan. terharu tu :D

i've planned to write about two c one lah. a longggggggggg one. include all the issues, the stupid things, the juicy news, the gossips, and it will be awesome. bndanya aku takdelaa ngn dorg selama dorg ade kat sekola ni kan. kire aku sbnanye baru setahun satu suku je tu. so nawa wani haje milah ke sape2 ke, i hope u can write about our class. u know them best kan.

sbb nilai sentimental nilah, another fact that i've got three days left in this year to be with them, makes me feel odd. i feel a bit sedeh and i dont know why before ni aku laa queen ponteng yg dikenali, tapi skrg aku rase taknak cuti sekolah.

aku nak camni ;
kite sekolah sepanjang tahun, kecuali pape cuti lah and kite boleh amek cuti bile2 kite nak. ade had lah kan. mcm org kerja. maybe 15 hari maximum tanpa surat yg disahkan.
TANPA SURAT OKKKK.
terbaik bukan???
haha.
vote me for the election then. and i will change malaysia. we can change (obama).

speaking of obama, obama menang!
p diddy black eye peas the jackson family sme support die weh!
mane taknye dorg kan black --"


teringat lagu michael jackson ; black and white X)

anddd, malam ni heroes volume three oh!!!
three words :

OH MY GOD.

the examinations part 2

berppp. ahh. kenyang makan maggi. ye ah kan da habes periksa.
must have something lah kan like officially reminding yourself that you are free from the burden of studying (mcm aku sebegitu rajin je) at least for another less than two months for people who aren't going to the tuition lh (damn).

okeh. di sini disenaraikan dugaan sepanjang peperiksaan *mengeluh panjang*

1. Isnin : Science and Geography
semalam tu, yakni ahad god i was in mountain of trouble. belajar geo tak masuk otak. i think the book stared at me back thinking how stupid this girl was. takkanlaa perkataan2 tu pon takleh masuk otak???? the main factor of my disfunctional brain was because my precious professional notebook was borrowed by a friend. takpelah aku terima kenyataan kau buat harta lak barang aku. so aku nanges. dahla hujan maha lebat, so menadah tanganlaa aku. pray and cry, so me.

then after solat n sedikit mengaji, jiwa tenang balik. walaupon aku belajar geo yg belakang2 tu sekali lalu je, alhamdulillah dapat jawab. mau tak stress ngn budak2 laki esp akmal menghafal segala detail bagai nak rak. di manakah stesen pertama monorel, di manakah stesen terakhirnya dan namakan tempat yang dilaluinya? termuntah aku dengar orang hafal bnda camtuh. gila rajin! ta kesahlaa. da last minute. pastu tak kuar lak pasal monorel. raya cina la aku. haha. alhamdulillah la :)

Science. keluar paper two sekali die kasi gambar gall bladder ngn lung ngn urinal ape tah namanye tu. mane la aku tau! ingat aku hafal ke bnda yg aku belajar time form one? tbe2 ilham muncul. excrete : melepas dll. excretion : noun melepas. maka muncullah perkataan excretion system. tak tepat tp tcer kate accepted. fuaa legaa. tak cukup tu, keluar lak bnda2 soalan mcm menyeksakan gila. i never thought final could be this difficult oh bcos usually the tests are the tough ones kan so to prepare us for final. yg nak takot final pon sebab kne belajar semuanya. sekali, ish. tayah describe ah.

kesimpulan ; alhamdulillah geo a (thanks nawa mempromote kite skali lagi di blog awk)
and science, close to b, most probably b trus. padan muke aku :(( please ya allah!

3. Selasa : Mathematics.
kertas dua agak toughla. soalan first da kantoi. sape punye anak la ni (mama tolong mengaku). tapi agak confident sbb aku hafal loci. heheh. cume obviously takkan dapat melebihi result lepas2laa. susah i tell u. kertas satu. ok. which is the most pathetically annoying???

a) u got it wrong for the question u know nothing about
b) u got it wrong for the question u positive know how to answer yet for limited time u did it halfway which means u answer it wrong when u know the steps. and the other one : u didnt use calculator for a question and instead answer it using the steps other people do when the question comes to paper two.

i wish i am in the a category. which is a lie because i'm the b one. git. we often think that the objective paper is lots easier because u'll just ushu di ada tisu when u dont know how to answer the question. and u can even try for each of the option. but one fact is missing ;

when u answer a question halfway, put away the fact that u actually know how to do it, u mark a close-to-correct answer and u get NOTHING. this wont happen in subjective paper, u can always do something u know, at least, in a question to get a minimum 1 mark. at least u got one out of two ke kan.

daripada aku???????? takkan la aku nak ckp
"tcer saya tau camne nak buat tapi saya gelojoh sgt smp tak bwat habes. boleh tak tcer kasi markah 0.5?? *battling eyelashes".

kesimpulan : ade potential for a b.

3. Rabu : KHB and Agama
the previous day aku dok menelaah buku khb kesayangan je. tak sentuh langsung la buku agama yg masuk 30 bab tu. then masa jwb khb, ada gak ah kenpius tp boleh la kot. cume ade dua da konpem salah. takleh tahan, masa daa habes jawab khb, aku pon duduk boring. most of us da siap kot, and i cant find a reason why they held us when we had already finished (kat mrsm kalau da siap boleh hantar dan blah ke psp).

tbe2 nmpk nawa berckp sorg2 dgn tgn mcm berdebat pasal politik. jap2 die ketuk kepala. mengstudy agama kot. gila rajin. kalau aku takdelaa aku nak hafal bnda camtu time paper laen. i salute u lah nawa. mula2 aku je perasaan, aku da takleh cover gelak. pastu zul, haj n wani pon tgk. haha. same seperti nawa, akmal pon jenis yg mcm2. time tu jugaklaa die nak nyanyi lagu klasik, siap lentok2 kepala goyang2 pejam mata mendalami lagi tu. dielaa radio klasik fm kitorg :D

kesimpulan : khb ade sinar harapan dan agama ade sinar kepupusan kebahagiaan :(

4. Khamis : Sejarah dan PS
sejarah, wooo aku dua bab tak sempat khatam oh. gilaaaa. dahlaa bab belakang2 yg tak masuk periksa lagi. kalau byk kuar kali ni telan salivala aku.pg td 6.30-7.30, aku bace dgn maximum speed. dapatlaa habeskan. cume masuk tak masuk tu kite serahlaa pada allah ye. bila buat, ya allah memang merciful. banyak kuar depan2 yg aku byk bace, sikit kuar belakang2 yg aku sikit bace. tapi still adelaa yg salah kan.

so far 4 dah hangus. tu yg tau. yg taktau, tak berani nak pk :(

PS lak, sekali lagi aku hancuss. time midyear dulu tayah ckplaa, kau lukis gune kaki pon lagi cantek. yg kali ni better la, cume nmpk cam budak tadika pnye karya. at least takdela akmal ingat bukit aku tu bonggol mas --"

tapi memang susahlaaaa, water colour pon aku tak reti nak handle ya allah ape laa nak jadi ngn aku ni. aku harap ah simpati sape2 nak tolong tp bila masing2 buat derk aku pon merayu kat haz. malangnya cgu tgh round2 time tu. pastu bila da tahap climax, aku tgk budak2 aku sorg pon tade. semua da siap and pergi bersukaria basuh palet simbah2 air la tu. genting ni.

last2 akmal kasi arahan mcmane nak bwat ngn senang dan cepat. aku pon bwatlaaa secret step die tuh. tak jadi. tangan aku mmg takde tenaga nak berseni btolla. pastu zul tolong praktikkan. naseblaa jadi walaupon buruk dan tak mengikut citarase aku. akmal lak, jeles kat kerbau2 yg aku lukis tu. memanglaa aku tak lukis muke die, sukati ah kan. ni die gi buat mata plak kat sekor kerbau tu. woii kerbau aku lagi hensem tanpa mata kau tu la!!! sure kaw2 kne kritik nanti. adeh. ni kali kedua mereka menolong dlm exam seni. midyear pon tolong gak. maybe sbb aku pandai buat muke ksian dan memerlukan pertolongan kot :D

kesimpulan : sej aku ade sinar walaupon tak terang. and ps??? tak kuasa nak pk. haha

____________________________________________________________________

semua sekali : mesti tak dapat 8 a :( ape tah lagi berada di top. redhakan je laaaa :) (fake smiley), still ada masa untuk doa! doadoadoa --"