Kawan itu camne?

i made a lot of friends when i was in my primary school. girls and boys, in the class and out of the class, same batch or not, and other people. many i considered best friends as well. my best friends back then were not only the groups called whatever and nevermind, my circle wasnt that small.

i accepted the tittle best friends easily.



sikit2 best friend. how everything was easy and childish. budak2 skola rendah, biasela. best friends forever, one of the words. senang sgt jdkan org bestfriend. without knowing what the term actually means. yes if u look up in the dictionary, acquaintance, friends and associates may have the same meaning, but they mean differently to me. dulu bangga je bila org panggil kite bestfriend. weh kite ade lima belas besfren, awk ade spoloh je hahaha. having lots of bestfriends were great, but my feeling now is 'great' too.

if we were best friends back then, we are still best friends now. the past tense wouldnt take place. well of course tak semuaa, tp kebanyakan. best friends dont leave, bestf riends dont forget, best friends dont ignore. everything would be the same even when i went to serting, even when we are in different schools, classes, even when we have found new friends, the bond of so called best friend would still be there.

but now? look at us. baru setahun dua tak jmpe dah buat tak kenal and we called ourselves bestfriend??? bffla konon.


actually the term itself is special. as special as the term lover is. no wonderla budak2 sekarang senang2 guna term best friend mcm panties pakai buang, sebab dorg dah biase dengan term 'clash'. best friends and lovers should be special, not the ones u'll left one day. its just i want to make it clear, how best friends and lovers shouldnt be treated that way. how best friends shouldnt be treated as if they were your lovers. but mine did, so i would say i have been dumped many times. great eh? takyah couple pun.


biasenya lepas zaman kite sesama, kite blah. die blah. then perkataan kawan baik itu pon blah pergi tong sampah. sayangkan? pada aku bnda2 precious ni, tak dpt nak describe ngn perkataan tau. tapi the closest word to what i'm talking about is bestfriend. and it is universal. so kalau kau tak rase tu best friend, kalau kau rase kau perlukan die time korg together2 je, jgn pggl best friend. ok?


i myself now do not use too may terms of best friends in my life. sbb rapat tak bermakna bestfriends, dan kalau aku tak cakap kau best friend aku tak bermakna aku tak anggap kau bestfriend. mungkin sebab aku taknak org lain kecik hati. the point is i dont let u know everything. and maybe u never bother to question about this crap kan, so it's not really a prob to u la kan. bestfriend tak bestfriend, kawan je la ye tak?

hargai perkataan tu sendiri, before kau hargai sesapa. rapat rapat jelaa, tp jgn senang2 nak iktiraf sape2 sbg ape2. best friend ke, lover ke, sama je, strong terms tu.

but then, after all these years of friendship and whatever the term is, after all these years of meeting people and watching them fade away while i'm still vividly here. i learn something. people do move on. it's just something WE do. maybe keadaan tak mengizinkan untuk jadi rapat (tp siotla kan kpd org2 yg aku dah try nak rapat semula tp buat tak layan), sape tau?

cuma dlm tak rapat tu, jgn la lupa org yg korg pernah create memories bersama. aku tak pnah lupa dorg. and i never regret calling them bestfriends, never regret may i say wasting the tittle, never regret loving them, even when they care nothing about me now. it is because, people coming and leaving is just the norm of life. something we cant change. they leave with their promisess, it's just unavoidable.

it has happened to me, still happening and will always happen. it's just the matter of time. i have to accept it.

so why not, before they move on and YOU move on, share your days together, create little fantastic memories, spend the precious moments with laugh and care and love. their presence in your life may change something, may bring some silver linings, and so will their leaving someday. just remember everything happens for a reason.

if u put the saying into your perspective, u may be ready for the unprepared. dont be afraid of meeting people and knowing them, before they go, mark another name in your life. u r lucky enough if u get a name which u will treasure forever. so just, despite of my babbling, just let's get back to basic; kawan biar seribu. okay? but of course no matter how precious friends and lovers are, dont ever apply this concept of friendship into a relationship sudahla.

berkawan biar seribu, berkasih biar satu.

aku rase aku baru di'dumped' dua hari lepas. mula2 aku feelingla jap, then aku just tak fikir pape dah. die dah pergi, die dah bosan, die dah taknak kwn ngn aku. ye aku kesah, tp aku takdela meratap. aku takkan lupakan kenangan menggamit memori bersama, tp aku tak pernah benci sape2 bila dorg tinggalkan aku. senang kate aku taula limit bila nak sedih. aku dah jadi biase. aku dah tau one day dorg akan pergi gak, and aku bukanla jenis tak rasional or logikal nak harap bukan2.

it's just another name in my life, the history repeats itself again. u are just another name that left, still i never want to erase u away. despite my hesitation everytime i pictur ur face, everytime i refuse to remember, u r still in here. cuma dgn aku kau bertuah wahai budak, kalau kite fall apart mcmtu je, takde reason, pintu hati aku terbukak lg untuk terima kalau kau sudi nak jenguk aku. aku bukan jenis nak tendang org sesuka hati kalau org tu tak sakitkan hati aku tahap aku merana gila.

i think i have been positive nowadays. i have met people i consider close friends, and people who consider me as a best friend, but i have to be the one who waits for the calls and the texts. i have to be the one who is left behind. menyedihkan ya, tp selepas beberapa pengalaman, dah jd biase tau? each time i find a new friend, i just want to have the max with them, and then wait till they do the leaving. everyone will leave, everyone will move on.

maybe in our case, maybe u will.
or maybe i will,
we'll never know.

so lets just get down and boogie,
treat each friendship u find worth fighting for like no other,
just buang yg keruh ambil yg jernih even when u know it might not last long,
give and take,
learn something from this one,
make it worth crying for
pray for the period of the bond,
pray for the impossible,
dont afraid to say 'forever' again
dont afraid to dream,
before one of us moves on first.

be positive and look at every friendship and 'clash' brightly,
and if you look at life like that,

you are ready for the unexpected.

but of course, pandangan2 di atas hanyalah sesuai untuk diapplykan pada friendship yg elok2 saje, janganla korg kawan ngn org yg tak patut pastu buat mcm tu. sangat tak seswaaiiiiiii ok.

tapi kalau korg kawan ngn aku takpe.

'never leave a friend' stock is guaranteed,
insyaallah =)