Only Ma

sometimes a thought strikes me,
and other thoughts always follow.
how i only ever really love one person,
who will be the reason of my worst sorrow.
i don't care about another to compare.
between those thoughts,
are tears.
ma.
i just cry.
like i've never cried before.
like i'll never love anyone again.
but i know i haven't cried the most.
i haven't felt the worst pain.
i'd choose to die
over a loss.

red eyes of mine, wet laps of mom's, a quietness of a kind

she must think her daughter is crazy for crying silently

ma, i wish i was.